When you choose to be positive, you choose your future. — Unknown
Woke up way too early again on a Saturday morning. I have been working through a lot of personal stuff and the thoughts are noisy and intrusive. I’ve always loved Brené Brown’s advice to sit in the discomfort of one’s vulnerability, because exposure to discomfort builds tolerance and resilience. So I’m choosing to sit with the head full of noise. Picking out the strands that I can pick out will help, and telling myself those that I can’t can stay jumbled. They’re for sorting out another day.
@yellywelly
We’re told these days that we can choose our future, that we can control what happens to us. If we manifest using specific words, if we behave a certain way, if we one day decide to radically change our lives in pursuit of the future we want, if we eat less/more of certain foods…it all boils down to controlling something we haven’t even experienced yet.
The only thing we can control is how we react to our environment. We react to our environment through small daily actions that become routine and habitual. When things become routine, they become predictable. This is how you can predict the future.
“But predictable is boring!” I’m sure a lot of you will say. And to that I say, NO IT IS NOT! When we habitually strive to find joy, when we routinely try to look for the positive, it becomes second nature, it becomes part of who we are, and that’s how we bake positivity and hope into our future. When we choose to view everything as potentially filled with light and joy, we choose a future filled with exactly that. The future will always be an unknown quantity, but if we sit with the knowledge that, whatever it is, there will always be hope that it could be shining, shimmering, splendid, that is the exciting part of it all.
What small thing will you do today that your future self will thank you for?
Tomorrow is not a threat. It is a promise.— Unknown
I’ve been going through a really anxious period in my life, filled with uncertainty. I’ve been vacillating between feeling convicted that I’m doing the right thing, and then doubting my decision to put myself (my health and my self-advocacy) first. I’ve not been sleeping. I think my subconscious has been dreading the future because there is so much uncertainty about it, and it has been preventing my brain from switching off and resting, thinking there is danger when I get to tomorrow.
When you are a person who lives with anxiety, the future is something that is an unknown space where anything and everything can (and if your anxiety is to be believed) and will go wrong. But that’s the thing. Tomorrow, the future, is unknown. So while there is the possibility that things could go wrong, there is also the equal possibility that things could go VERY right.
Maybe that’s the reframe that needs to happen: tomorrow, the future, IS NOT a guarantee of danger. There is every chance that things could go very right. Maybe that possibility is the best thing to hold on to.
I know our relationships are meant to be safe spaces where we should be allowed to say anything we want, how we want to say things, when we want to say things. And for the most part, it’s true. Our relationships should offer us a place where we are able to express ourselves, where we can whinge and be brutally honest about how we feel.
I love a good whinge! It’s nice to be able to complain about something to someone and hear the agreement or the quiet chuckle because they get how we feel about something, someone, the state of the world and the lack of common sense in most things in general. There is a sense of validation in knowing that you’re not alone in feeling the way you do.
I am finding, lately, the constant whinge in some friendship circles to be fairly tiresome. I find myself rolling my eyes at yet again another statement about the stupidity of things or people, or gritting my teeth at a negative slant in expressing an opinion about something. I’m not surprised though, because life in general has been difficult and with the general state of things everywhere, it can be difficult to make like the Monty Python boys and look at the bright side of life. I get that completely. It’s just that sometimes, I wonder, is it really THAT bad ALL the time?
I also get that most people aren’t aware of the negativity in how they structure their statements (both written and verbal) and in their communication style. I understand that is a “them” issue and not a me issue. It is a them outlook problem and not a me outlook problem. I have, hopefully, in the past expressed the desire to look at the positive angle in things, hopefully repeatedly, and whether or not that is noticed or acknowledged is again a “them” issue.
I have always tried to be balanced in terms of my view in life – there is a positive and there is a negative. Life can be difficult and unfair sometimes, but I have always had the desire to look on the flipside. Because, while life is difficult, there are small pockets of joy. These moments of light allow us to appreciate what we have and not what is missing. When we focus on what we have, and not what’s missing, then we feel contentment.
Lately, despite adversity, I’ve found contentment to be the best way forward. It’s not denying how bad things are, it’s just appreciating that despite the bad things that have happened, there is still a lot of good.
I have promised myself to protect this sense of contentment – to the extent of allowing myself to cull certain elements of conversation, limit reactions and interactions in certain relationships. I get that these are just speaking out, and letting off steam. I get that. In the same vein, I do not want to be exposed to negativity. In the same way that these people are letting off steam so that they protect their equilibrium, I am also limiting my exposure to the noxious fumes of negativity that endanger my own equilibrium. We all have to do what we can to survive this jungle!
Yellywelly 